June 1, 2012 in Uncategorized
1. This is my nephew Clay. Clearly, he is awesome.
This is Clay and his beautiful friend Danielle. Clearly, she is awesome too.
Today, they left on a bike ride. A major bike ride.
900 plus miles, 3 weeks, 7 states, 60 miles per day, 10 riders.
Their trip doesn’t relate to me in the slightest way, other than the fact that I’m so dang excited for them I can’t concentrate on anything at all right now.
And…….though I’m not a bike rider, I am so going to live vicariously through their experience. This is an excursion not too many people get to experience. They are very lucky. Annnnddd, if I live vicariously, I won’t be the one pedaling up the massive, tortuous hills. And I won’t have to camp out at night after riding 60 miles a day.
Yes. Living vicariously is the way to go.
My fears for their trip…..
1. Clay and Danielle will not wear sunscreen.
2. They will not take enough pictures, and they will not make regular updates to social media sites. Aunt Penny needs constant updates and photographs.
3. Clay will not have enough food.
This is possibly my biggest concern. My nephew can abolish food like nothing anyone could imagine. I truly can not even begin to describe it. Three regular meals a day is not enough for this dude. Especially after burning the amount of calories he will be. I have visions of him coming home in 3 weeks and weighing about 40 pounds. I also have visions of Clay collapsing on the side of the road, because the 3 cheeseburgers he ate 6 hours ago simply did not meet the calorie intake his body requires. He lays there, unable to rise or talk or see, until somebody pours a 2 pound milkshake into his open, parched mouth. Hopefully, if this does happen, the rest of the crew will wise up and throw him a slice of pizza every 20 minutes to prevent food-depravation-induced fainting. I can see him catching the pizza in his teeth, swallowing it whole, all while continuing to ride his bike. I envision that he growls when he catches the pizza in his teeth.
I had my own little adventure last night.
I am very happy to say that I ran two miles.
This is the farthest I have ever ran before.
I feel like a badass.
Once my gallbladder comes out, I think I will be able to KILL the running thing. “The Jerk” just so happened to be agreeable with running last night, so I took advantage of it.
Next on my running goals……a solid 5k!!!!!! Um…..a very SLOW 5k. I’m not fast. And that’s okay.Tweet